visitation rightsI want to see my son without his mother around. there is no court order saying i can't be with him without her. does she h...

Question

visitation rights

I want to see my son without his mother around. there is no court order saying i can't be with him without her. does she have the right to refuse me from seeing my son, even if i want to take him downtown with me without his mother being with us?

Answer

Re: visitation rights

The general answer is yes, based on the assumption that you are documented as the child's father on affidavit of paternity, birth certificate, paternity action, or parenting plan. The trick here is that without a parenting plan/residential schedule, you both in theory have full authority, and you can jerk each other around until one of you goes to court and settles the issue of residential time (visitation). If the two of you can agree on a schedule you should and then petition for it and get it entered.

Answer

Re: visitation rights

You can download a parenting plan from the forms page at courts dot wa dot gov.

The idea is to have a roadmap for when you have residential time with your son. You should nail down to the minute what time on what days and how you want to treat holidays and special occasions.

If the child is going to primarliy reside with his mother your time with him is every other weekend and every other holiday and often, and a "midweek" overnight - make it a Thursday so you get a long weekend every other weekend, and supper together once a week no matter what. Then be there for him.

You can add other provisions, such as right to access health care information, right to access school information and a clause that allows either of you to make minor changes on written agreement to facilitate work schedules or whatever.

Your child needs access to both parents - just at separate times, if you two are no longer together.

You can do a lot of this by agreement, or you can lawyer up and spend a fortune. How it happens is very much up to you. I think what Mr. Steuart is pointing out is that we commonly see people fighting over a foregone custody conclusion when they would be better off being realistic and developing a useful parenting plan.

And don't be lazy and say:"As the parties agree" - because if you agreed you would still be together.

Hope this helps. Elizabeth Powell