My husband is having an extramarital relationship and has been living with the other woman for last 5 months and now has filed for a divorce...

Question

My husband is having an extramarital relationship and has been living with the other woman for last 5 months and now has filed for a divorce.

We'd been married for 28 years and have lived 22 years during the marriage in CA. I was always a full time mother and a housewife for 27 years

by the mutual agreement when our first child was born...and therefore I have no income of my own.

According to my marriage counselor/therapist...because of duration of our marriage, and under the CA divorce law, we have to divide everything

in HALF (assets/debt) and he is responsible for alimony consist of HALF of his current/future income (earnings) as the result of divorce.

Is this really an accurate information? Or do I still need to go through unwanted and ugly procedures in order to meet the terms and agreements

before my divorce is finalized by the court?

Thank you.

Answer

Your marriage counselor obviously does not have a legal background and has misstated several things. Let's start from the top.

California Community property law will be determinative as you have lived in California for over 6 months. That means all assets and debts acquired during the community is divided evenly. That part the counselor got right; however you may want to see what community monies he used in participation of that extramarital affair. It's also important to make sure monies are not hidden which occurs often in cases of infidelity.

Spousal Support for a long term marriage is based on Family Code 4320. It does not give "half" his income, rather uses the 4320 factors to determine an amount necessary to maintain the lifestyle you have become accustom to. Now due to the marriage being over 10 years, the support order will be a permanent support order, however that does not mean the rest of his life. By law if you remarry or either party dies support is terminated. It also can be terminated or severely reduced if you co-habitat with another person of the opposite sex. The amount further can be decreased if you become gainfully employed, which you will have an obligation to become self-supporting. Also if he has a bona fide retirement or loses his job, then support would likely zero out as well. Basically what I am telling you is that Permanent Support does not mean lifetime support. That being said if he wants to agree to half his net income it would likely be more then you would get at court.

I always advise an individual to hire an attorney. Just because you are represented does not mean it has to get messy. Often attorneys help decrease tensions, at a time that it desperately needs it. Feel free to contact our offices at 925-225-1025 for a free consultation.